


My (Cyborg) Immortal

by sirsparklepants (pixieface)



Series: looking sharp, looking for love [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Sorry Not Sorry, excess exclamation points, goffick, my immortal parody, sadly features no Hot Topic clothes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 07:31:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11801358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pixieface/pseuds/sirsparklepants
Summary: a lot of peopel tell me i look like Toshiro Mifune (a/n: if u don’t know who that is go watch some kurosawa!!!) and i guess i would if i grew a beard!!! but… i can’t since my brother tried to kill me in a horribel accident. at least it got me these kewl cyborg parts!!!(a scene fromClean Shirt, New Shoesin the style ofMy Immortal.)





	My (Cyborg) Immortal

**Author's Note:**

> No one told me not to do it, so I did it.

~~Hello~~ Hi my name is ~~Inigo~~ ~~Enoby~~ ~~Ebony~~ Shimada Genji and Ihave short ruffled raven black hair cuz im japanese and bright red cyborg enhanced eyes like bloody tears!!! i also have shny syborg armor all over my body except for my chest and arm whic are toned but not too msucled and my face which is angular in a handsome way!!! a lot of peopel tell me i look like Toshiro Mifune (a/n: if u don’t know who that is go watch some kurosawa!!!) and i guess i would if i grew a beard!!! but… i can’t since my brother tried to kill me in a horribel accident. at least it got me these kewl cyborg parts!!!

currently i wans’t waring anything but my cyborg armor because i was hiding out in a clothes store with my bff and sekrit crush jessee mcree!! it wasnlt hot topic but it was almost as good because they had a lot of goffic clothes with rips and chains and zips! i dressed in black all thet ime anyway bcuz we were in blackwatch the seecret division of overwatch (a/n get it theyre goffs because its BALCKwatch) but it was nice 2 have sum clothes with STYEL!!! i had plenty of money on the black card i stope from my relatives when they killed me bcuz i knew they were going to but i didnt have time to run away and it wouldnt have been honorable anyway! so i could dress jesse up too. i didn’t call him jessee i called him agent mccree but i got to call him darling for this missioN! or maybe that was wut he called me lol i’m so random i’m not sure!!!

i was talking 2 the shop assistant when jesse came out in tight goffick jeans with zips on them and a so not goffic shirt!! I had to fix that so i made him put on a gray shirt with red roses on it because of his romantic heart! i didn’t tell him that of course but I was thinking it! he came out and showed off his outfit. i looked at his thighs and they made me weak in the knees. luckily i was a cyborg so i just sent a command to make my joints lock up!! that made everything lock up though so i was quiet while i manually unlocked everything but my knees. i hope jessee didn’t notice! i said something flirty and suave so he’d know i liked him without me having to tell him!! it’s not goffick to talk about feeligns that arent anger or sadness and since we were the goff division of overwatach i had to keep up our repuation even under cover!

jesee’s shoes were very goffick but becus he had the goffick cowboy look going on most of the time I had to put them on myself! i wanted to tease him a little 2 so he knew i wasn’t just complimenting him to be nice. feet are sexy to everybody rite? i think feet were sexy to jesus at least bcuz that lady washed his feet with her hair! mccreee was from texas or somwhere so he knew about jesus. i made sure i kneeled in front of him on purpose because being submissive is sexy to a big muscly man like him in america i heard. even thogh i’m from japan and we’re msotly all over europe and we’re in london rite now i used my underwolrd connections to find out! its important to respect your husbands culture! not that we were married but yknow maybe someday! 

then it was my turn to get dressesd. i had chosen my clothes very carefully because you have to be careful about the impression you give which is a lesson my father the crime lord taguth me. I think he was talking more about coming off as powerful and in charge but it applied to fashion and undercover work too. i didn’t need underwear because my armor was technically clothe seeing as my body was underneath the plates. but ppl r so mean about my cybork aprts that i had 2 cover them up!!! i wish i had goff plates but maybe someday!!! dr ziegler is kind of a prep but she understrands you have 2 have dramatics! bcuz dramatics r important i’d chosen a pair of billowy pants, a belt with a dragon head (a/n: dragons r goff bcuz i say so so there!!!) a black shirt with tigers n shit on it, and a big black coat wit a cowl neck! when i wuz finished dressing i looked at myself in the bakc mirror. the tailors assistant stared at me. I put up my middle finger at him.

**Author's Note:**

> Look, if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? 
> 
> About 90% of the typos are organic. I wrote this mostly on the bluetooth keyboard I have for my tablet for specifically that effect; that's what my writing looks like when I'm going too fast. 
> 
> [Toshiro Mifune](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/5e/b8/4d/5eb84db0a950ea4506f9cefd8e50cac7--toshiro-mifune-solution.jpg) looks way more like Hanzo than he does Genji (although he uses a sword in most of the Kurosawa movies he's in), but I kept that joke in because a) it's a sendup to Popcorn Redemption, one of my fave McHanzo fics, b) is a nod to the fact that Hanzo and Genji were once the same character, and c) that kind of mistake fits the mood of the piece, so there.
> 
> I'm extremely proud about implying Jesus (or maybe Mary Magdalene) had a foot fetish. I'm sorry I accidentally implied McCree was from the Bible Belt. That's probably the only thing I'm sorry for in the whole fic.


End file.
